


The Secret Life Of Sasuke

by RussiaNecroAkito



Series: The Secret Life Of..... [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-11
Updated: 2015-08-11
Packaged: 2018-04-14 05:44:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4552899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RussiaNecroAkito/pseuds/RussiaNecroAkito
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What do you do when you hear loud music in the middle of the night? Find the source of course!</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Secret Life Of Sasuke

**Author's Note:**

> Ok So I originally posted this story on Deviant Art. My username on there is Akitokiki. I figured I might as well post my stories elsewhere since DA seems to be losing people. Anywho, this is a crack-fic. So you have been warned. I hope you enjoy and feel free to tell me what you think. And to request more crack-fics.

You were sleepy. Well, sleepy was an understatement. You were lucky enough to live a stones throw from the Uchiha compound. And for the last 2 weeks weird sounds and music kept you up at night. You finally had enough. Slowly and quietly you crept over to where the music was coming from. You found a window and looked in. And you instantly regretted it. Sasuke stood in the middle of the room. He was wearing a long black velvet cloak, lined with sliver. Thick black eyeliner outlined his eyes. Bright red lipstick made his face seem pale. Instead of the normal duck-butt hair, he had tight curls that afroed out. Suddenly music started and he started to sing. "How you doing? I see you've met my faithful handy man. He's just a little brought down. When you knocked he thought you were the candy man."

Sasuke starts walking over to a really gaudy looking throne.

"Don't get strung out, by the way I look. Don't judge a book by its cover.I'm not much of a man by the light of day. But by night I'm one hell of a lover."

You watch in disbelief. It was like watching a train wreak. It was so horrid but you just couldn't look away. Sasuke untied the cloak and threw it to the side. You eyes widened. 'WHAT THE FUCK?' you thought. There the young Uchiha stood wearing a short tight grey vest corset looking thing that was tied in the front and showed his stomach. He wore a gaudy larger pearl necklace. Long sparkly grey arm warmer gloves As you look down you see the rest of the outfit. Grey boyshorts with garters. Grey tights that reached the garters. To finish it off he wore 12 inch bright white sparkly hooker heels. The heels seemed to have jewels attached. Without realizing it you took your phone out and took a few pics. Sasuke was so absorbed in what he was doing that he didn't notice. You watch as the performance continued.

 

"I'm just a sweet transvestite. From transexual Transylvania." The cross dressed boy wiggled his hips and started walking to the other side of the room where two practice dummies stood, dressed as a man and woman.

"Let me show you around, maybe play you a sound. You look like you're both pretty groovey." He put his arms around the dummies. "Or if you want something visual that's not too abysmal. We could take in an old Steve Reeves movie."

The music played on and made the dummies talk. "We're glad we caught you at home. Could we use your phone. We're both in a bit of a hurry. We'll just say where we are and go back to the car. We don't want to be any worry."

Sasuke made the dummies roll forward and started to dance on the one that looked like a guy.

"Well you got caught with a flat, well, how bout that? Well babies don't you panic. By the light of the night, when it all seems alright. I'll get you a satanic mechanic."

He walked back to his throne and put his hands on his hips and wiggled them more. And then slowly and sexually sat in the oversized chair."I'm just a tweet transvestite from transexual, Transylvania." He sang. He was surprisingly good. That didn't stop you from taking video tough. 'I always knew he wasn't all there' you thought to yourself.  
Sliding sideways he slowly kicks one leg over the other so they cross. 

"So why don't you stay for the night? Or maybe a bite? I could show you my favourite obsession. I've been making a man with blond hair and a tan and he's good for relieving my tension"

Slowly he rolled so his feet touched the ground. "I'm just a sweet transvestite from transexual Transylvania."  
He slowly pulled himself up like he had just gotten done giving a lap dance. His hand found his hips again. "Hey Hey." He gave a kick and punched the air. "I'm just a sweet transvestite." He rolled his arms and shook his hips. "From transexual, Transylvania."

The no longer duck-butt young man sauntered over to a door way. Grabbing the door frame, he danced down it and back up. 

"So come up to the lab and see whats on the slab. I see you shiver in antici.......pation! But maybe the rain isn't really to blame. So I'll remove the cause. But not the symptom!" As the trumpets ended the song he disappeared. You stop your phone video. Slowly you start the short walk home. You shivered. "Great. This is going to haunt me for the rest of my life." "What's going to haunt you?" a voice behind you said. You turned around and saw the Uchiha, no longer in the clothes he danced in. You look at him and say, "You didn't take off your lipstick, duck-butt." As the words left your mouth you turned around and walked away. Leaving the Uchiha to run back to his house cussing. 

'I wonder if anyone else has a secret life.' you thought evilly.


End file.
